


Return

by Cassiel



Category: Supernatural
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-18
Updated: 2012-12-18
Packaged: 2017-11-21 12:06:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/597570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cassiel/pseuds/Cassiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"The hardest part is forgiving them. Forgiving your own brother for dying, just when times got hard. Maybe, if they had been there, you'd not have been so easily corrupted. You think about what could have been, had there been a little guidance in the times you needed it." Gabriel is back, Cas and the boys want to know how. Destiel and Sabriel. T for now. Alternating POVs. Multichapter WIP.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Return

I've always said that everybody has their demons. Not literally of course, I mean, not everybody is compatible to be possessed by a demon. But figuratively, yes. And especially the Winchesters. The Winchesters have been to hell and back (quite literally), plus heaven to boot. Most of their friends have passed away. And since meeting them, so have I. Multiple times. But it's not what matters, dying. People die every day. The worst part of it is seeing a dead person come back. You think you're hallucinating. You're not quite sure if their real or not; of course, after a while it becomes to status quo that you show up after you die. But still, nothing beats the heart wrenching look in somebodies eyes when they see somebody they loved return.

And at that moment, in the eerily quiet, warmly lit hotel room, one could practically feel a surge of quiet go through their bodies. The man (I use that term loosely, must I add) stood in the corner, a gruesome look on his face as his eyes bore into the eyes of the taller Winchester. Quiet loomed over us. As I heard Dean use the phrase once, you could hear a pin drop. The man breathed heavily, black and purple bags underneath his eyes, his arms hanging limply from his sides. I'd never seen one of... my kind in such bad condition, without injury at least. He looked sleep deprived, his usually shiny locks oily, his lips chapped. He looked like he was about to fall over on the spot. Barely able to hold himself together, the man opened his mouth to speak.

And weakly (but surely), that's what he did. "Hey Sammy."

And he collapsed.

We rushed to Gabriel's side. Sam grabbed his head and used his fingers to check his pulse. "He's out cold, but he's alive." He turned to me, his eyes wide. "Cas, can you fix him?"

I looked at the angel. "It's difficult. But I do think... I can help enough to get him up. He'll have to clean himself though." Healing another angel was difficult, and required me pulling from my own energy source. It was difficult, sure, but I could manage. It'd leave me tired. I walked over and kneeled next to him and placed my hand on his forehead. I shut my eyes and did it. My chest swelled, connecting the bond between Gabriels and my soul. I frowned as I felt the cracked shell of his soul. I tried to get a better feel, but he jerked away before I could.

Filling with life, his eyes opened manically. "Castiel!"

I jumped when he leapt to his feet, knocking Sam aside. He looked around, and his shoulders relaxed from his defensive hunch, as he realized his surroundings. "Sam..." he muttered, helping the large human up from the ground. "Dean," he gestured towards Dean, smiling for the first time in his arrival. "Castiel." He nodded at me graciously, and I repeated the gesture, fatigued. He looked around. "I could really go for a candy bar right now." He snapped and one appeared. I should've known he would've wasted my gift of life on a silly thing. Now that he was healed, he should have had his full grace back. 

"Gabe..." Sam whispered, using the affectionate nickname he'd fashioned for the angel. I'd never understood it, why humans made nicknames for each other. I'd have to add it to the long list of questions I had to ask Dean about. "How?"

"No idea. One moment I'm playing angry prison guard with Little Lucy," I'm sure he meant Lucifer, "and the next, I show up here." He unwrapped the candy and stuck it in his mouth. "You have any ideas?" He looked at me and blinked. I shook my head, calculating all of the possible ways he could be here. But there were so many.

"Could it be god?" Sam spoke up. I considered this possibility of course, but nobody had spoken to god in... well, in a while at least.

I narrowed my eyes, not in anger, but in thought. In calculation. I hesitantly responded. "Yes, it could be god."

"I'll call Bobby," Dean suggested, pulling out his mobile and flashing it up before turning away into the next door room. "Sam and I will go to the diner." He waved his hand and walked out the door.

"I'll... leave you two to catch up," Sam nodded, his brows furrowing. He turned into the other room, following Dean. There was a slam of the front door.

I turned to Gabriel grimly.

The hardest part is forgiving them. Forgiving your own brother for dying, just when times got hard. Maybe, if they had been there, you'd not have been so easily corrupted. You think about what could have been, had there been a little guidance in the times you needed it. I could've been redeemed, I know this now. Now that I saw his face. But is he to blame? I knew from the glow in his eyes that he meant only well. He probably didn't even know the year. It was Lucifer's fault for killing him. But there was something in my dull, human body that made me feel angry at him. It was not something I was accustomed to. Discomfort, maybe. Irritation. But this was more than this. I could feel a large weight in my torso when I looked at him.

I shouldn't blame my sins on him, but maybe had he been there, I wouldn't have been so (to use Dean's words) fucked up.

"Take true form," I instructed him. "This is a conversation among angels. That is how it should take place."

There was a bright flash of light as we both changed, removing our human skin and taking our true form. We took up the entire room in wingspan alone and had to crouch uncomfortably to speak.

I spoke to him in Enochian. "What happened? Do you know of what occurred while you were gone?"

He replied, "I do not."

I replied, hanging my head low. "How many lives could be saved, Brother, had you been there?"

"Many, I'm guessing. But the brothers, they stopped it, did they not?"

"Barely. Only in time..." I turned away in shame, not for myself, but for my own brother. My wings retracted just enough for me to hang my head. Or what took its place.

"Then no problems have arisen since, I'm assuming?"

"You assume wrong. Dean and I were sent to purgatory, it took a... it took some effort to get him back. And I still don't know how I'm here."

"Not a surprise," he replied knowingly. had he been in his human form, I'm sure he would have been smirking as people put it. "You'd use up every weapon in heaven to get you Deano back, even if it meant you staying behind, wouldn't you, brother?"

"I care about him, yes." I wasn't stupid, nor was I naive. I knew exactly what the other angel was implying. "But that's not what I meant by effort."

"That's not what I meant either, Castiel."

"I know what you meant, Gabriel. Prior to contrary belief I am not a babied, naive infant. I've pulled men out of hell. I've been to war since you left, Gabriel. One cannot go to war without someone to fight for, Gabriel." I spat out the last word with malice intent as I neared him offensively. "And I'm not alone in the matter, I assume? I've noticed your vessels lustful glares towards a certain moose-like human. Don't think you're not obvious."

"Did you just compare Sammy to a moose? And yes, I'll admit my vessel has taken a liking to him, apparently."

"We both know it's not just your vessel, brother." I neared even closer.

"Alright. We both have a crush on the students. What are you going to do, call the principal on me? You know he'll drag us both to hell if he finds out."

I pause. "He wouldn't do that. Not to me. Not after..." Could God do that to me? After I'd served him... and betrayed him. A strike of fear shot through my heart. If I were to try and be with Dean... What would god do? 

"You see? So nobody is going to know about this. Daddy is already mad enough about your most recent mistakes, isn't he? We both know he's not too pleased about that? You were assigned to the Garrison to protect humanity, not to destroy it."

I breathe. I think. I realize. How could Gabriel know anything about that if he'd been gone for so long? My... mistakes had occurred long after he 'died'. "Looks like Gabriel knows a little more than he lets on."

"Oh right, I've been dead!" He turned back into his vessel, which was now completely clean and healed. "Completely spaced that!"

I looked at him stunned. He smiled. I turned back into my vessel. I frowned. "Gabriel. Where have you been?"

"That's for me to know," he snapped, making a tight, brown leather jacket appear on his arm. He pulled it on. "And you to not find out." He snapped again, disappearing. In his spot, was a small, golden box.

I wearily walked over to the box, shaken by my recent experience with Gabriel. It wasn't every day that your brother came back to life and fought about your romantic emotions about a human. Not for me at least. I picked it up and pulled out my cellphone, typing in Dean's phone number. The phone rang four times before he picked up.

"We're at the seventy six down the street," Dean said. I immediately flashed over to them, appearing in the middle of the store. I began to walk down the aisle with them.

"How'd it go?" Sam inquired. I became tense. I wasn't sure how to explain our falling out, or whatever it was called, without revealing to the brothers Gabriel's and my emotions about them.

"We… got into kind of a kafuffle." I wasn't sure how I knew the word, just that it explained out situation perfectly, without giving too much away.

"Well, did you find out why he's back?" Dean asked.

I'd lied to them so many times, it was a vice. I had to restrain and tell them the truth. But would it help them or hurt them? I wasn't sure, but I decided to anyway. "I don't think…" I paused. "I don't think he was gone the whole time. He mentioned some of the things that transpired while he was gone. As if he'd been there."

Deans shoulders hunched protectively, making my vessel warm and my cheeks flush. "You mean you think he was alive? And he didn't help you?" He looked away and muttered. "That son of a bitch…" Dean was still easily put off by my sins. He knew I was good now, how could he not after all we'd been through in purgatory, but whenever we talked about it I could tell he was reserved; still hurt by my betrayal. He didn't want to blame me for it, I could tell, but he had to.

"I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason…" Sam said, defending Gabriel.

"I have to agree with Sam here," I sighed. "Gabriel has always had good intentions, whether it seems like it or not. He's always cared. I think maybe he had no choice but to watch as I…" I trailed off, not wanting to admit to what I'd done.

"Fine. But we need to figure out why," Dean said abrasively. "Cas, we'll need some holy oil."

"Already on it," I flashed away, grabbed some holy oil from a shelf somewhere, and returned.

"Okay," Dean continued after a look of surprise at my speed. "We're going to summon ourselves an angel."


End file.
